This June marks Buntology’s fourth year in the blogging business.
In those four years we’ve posted articles on everything from the death penalty to summer vacation, online dating to mouse feces, and much, much more. Because of our unique and wide-spanning content, we’re often amused- and sometimes scared- to see what kind of search terms people are using to find our website.
Below is a list of the funniest, freakiest, and just plain odd, most commonly used search terms. Read it and have a laugh, we sure did!
Messed up animals 119 searches
In case we didn’t have enough proof that society was completely effed, here’s 119 more pieces of evidence. Messed up animals has been a pretty regular search term since 3/9/2009, when we posted an article about a chimpanzee named Santino being tested on his abilities to “think ahead.” Whoever the sickos are that actually click on said article in the hopes of seeing mutilated animals will likely be disappointed. To counteract the sad story of the chimp, we put pictures of cute baby animals at the end of the article. Who doesn’t love a baby panda!? View the original article here
Jon and Kate 5,000+ searches
When you work hard to try and produce intelligent and witty blog content, you can’t help but be a little bummed when your highest rated day is because of a cheap tabloid article written about a TLC reality show. When Jon & Kate Gosselin announced their divorce in May ’09, Buntology joined in the outcry and whipped up a quick 300-word piece to talk about our feelings on the issue. BOOM! Our traffic spiked to the highest it’s ever been, even higher than the Presidential inauguration. That’s almost as depressing as watching a family of eight fall apart on national television. View the original article here
Big bulges 82 searches
I was confused as to how people went from big bulges to Buntology. Upon further investigation, it’s just a well-hung mannequin that lead readers to the site. It’s a case of false advertising in more ways than one. View the original article here
Mark Zuckerberg is the devil 32 searches
Back before it was trendy, one Buntology staffer tried to deactivate their Facebook account. After being led through a confusing maze of a UI, they were given one last tug before finally pulling the trigger: “Are you SURE you want to deactivate your account? Look at all your friends who will miss you…” We already knew Zuckerberg was the devil, but apparently he’s also your religious grandma who wants to guilt trip you for not going to church. View the original article here
Stuff about hobos including but not limited to: funny hobos on the street, funny hobo signs, funny hobos, hobos with funny signs 110 searches
The people have spoken: hobos are hilarious! Somebody get on the phone with Etsy, I think we have an untapped market here for some hobo signage. Maybe a picture of a hobo holding a funny sign and on that sign is another picture of a hobo holding a funny sign, etc. etc. etc. My favorite experience with hobos and signs happened recently when I saw a man holding one that read, “Why lie? I need money for weed.” Don’t we all… don’t we all. View the original article here
Sexting 57 searches
Never one to mince words, when Anthony Weiner’s weiner was exposed via some racy texts last June, I couldn’t resist writing an article about it. Aside from my usual scathing and sarcastic remarks, the story also included some personal anecdotes about sexting along with a Mad-Lib style guide to help the more shy readers send their first sexts. To me, 57 searches about sexting is 57 people I’ve helped to get naked on their smart phone. My poor, poor father. View the original article here
1.) Male fupa
2.) he thinks i’m a whore
3.) methamphetamine ingredients
4.) isaac brock naked
Not gonna lie, I’m a little stoked that somebody found Buntology by searching for meth ingredients. I wonder if the same person making a meth lab is the same person who wants to see pictures of Isaac Brock naked, because you’d have to be pretty f*cked up to masturbate to that self-destructive, alcoholic upper-fiend (hmm, when I put it that way it sounds kind of hot). You could actually take the four honorable mentions and string together a pretty impressive sentence with them: “I was searching for methamphetamine ingredients when I stumbled across pictures of Isaac Brock naked; He thinks I’m a whore but you should’ve seen his male fupa.”